Hi!Today I would like to share three of my favorite tips for making it easier to establish a relationship with someone. Maybe in a new class. On a date. At work or in a job interview. Or at the New Year's party this weekend.Assume rapport.This one can work quickly. That is, if you can suspend your disbelief for while and keep your mind open. It won't work if you don't think it will work.So, what is assuming rapport?Basically, instead of going into a conversation or meeting nervously and thinking "how will this go?" you take a different approach. You assume that you and the person(s) will establish a good connection (rapport).How do you do that? Just before the meeting, you just think/pretend that you'll be meeting a good friend. Then you'll naturally slip into a more comfortable, confident and enjoyable emotional state and frame of mind. In this state of mind the conversation tends to flow more naturally too, without much thinking. Just like with your friends.I have used this small tip many, many times by now and have found it surprisingly useful and easy to implement. It's a sort of variation of acting as you would like to feel.This tip also helps you and the other people to set a good frame for the interaction. A frame is always set at the start of an interaction. It might be a nervous and stiff frame, a formal and let's-get-to-the-point kind of frame or perhaps a super relaxed one. The thing is that the frame that is set in the beginning of the conversation is often one that may stay on for a while.Now, meeting your best friend might not always be the best thing to think about before a meeting at school/work. In that case you may want to try to imagine a similar meeting that went well and your interactions with the people there.But what if you come off as a weird person? Well, that is always a risk in the beginning when you start using this tip. But I believe that most of the time such thoughts are only in your head. No one likes awkward and uncomfortable interactions. So if you just assume rapport immediately then most people that may have been nervous/felt awkward will adapt to your more comfortable and relaxed frame.This is also a quick way to reconnect with the mental and emotional state your friends might be referring to when they give you the classic advice to "just be yourself".See yourself in other people."Who sees all beings in his own self, and his own self in all beings, loses all fear."Isa Upanishad, Hindu ScriptureThe ego wants to divide your world. It wants to create barriers, separation and loves to play the comparison game. The game where people are different compared to you, the game where you are better than someone and worse than someone else. All of that creates fear in social situations. Doing the opposite removes fear.That there is no real separation between beings, that we are one and the same, might sound a bit corny.But one thought you may want to try for a day is that everyone you meet is your friend. You do this practically by using the previous tip.Another idea is to see what parts of yourself you can see in someone you meet.As I mentioned above, there is pretty much always a frame set in any interaction. It may make you and the others feel awkward or comfortable. But underlying such feelings is a frame of mind.Either it asks us how we are different from this person. Or how we are the same as this person. The first frame is based in how the ego likes to judge people and create separation to strengthen itself (either through feeling better or more like a victim). The second one creates warmth, an openness and curiosity within. There is no place to focus on fear or judgement anymore.So set the right frame of mind by asking yourself: what parts of this person can I see in myself? How is he or she like me?Practise.Although the two ideas above can be very useful, the most important thing - as with anything - is practise. By doing things and learning from mistakes, failures and successes you can improve any part of your life. Your social skills too.And by practise I mean using, for example, assuming rapport a couple of dozen times. Not two or three times.
By being open and believing that this stuff works and by practising it over and over - just like a tennis serve - it become easier and easier to do it. Both because you get better at it and because you doubt yourself less and less in such social situations.I hope this email will help you to make 2012 a year of new and exciting relationships,Henrik---------------------------------------------------
Want to learn much more about living a simpler, happier and less stressful life where you dare to follow and achieve your dreams in 2012? Then have a look at my four premium courses and guides:
The Self-Esteem Course - Stop feeling lousy about yourself and start living a life of self-happiness where you live up to your potential and dare to follow your dreams today.
Simplicity - My monthly membership course on how to simplify six of the most important areas in your life.
The Art of Relaxed Productivity - How I tripled my own productivity and effectiveness and decreased stress greatly.
The Power of Positivity - How to become a more mindful, motivated, action-taking optimist.
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
Thursday, December 8, 2011
The Truth About Hair and Why Indians Would Keep Their Hair Long -- Science of the Spirit -- Sott.net
Thursday, November 10, 2011
Subject: FFWD - Calgary News & Views - News - Cree speak in U.K. on oilsands
UPDATE: Crystal Lameman-Cardinal Speaks out...
News Release for November10,2011
She is so amazing & I can never thank her enough for speaking for us in a country that refuses to hear us or Mother Earth's cry!
The U.S. State Department has ordered an environmental assessment for a new Keystone XL pipeline route, allowing U.S. President Barack Obama to shelve the controversial issue until after the 2012 elections.
This story, forwarded to you, appears on http://www.cbc.ca at the following URL:
Shannon M Houle
Monday, November 7, 2011
|(L to R) Crystal's uncle Former Chief Al Lameman|
of Beaver Lake Cree Nation who spearheaded
the legal case, herself, & Cooperative
Group/Bank UK Colin Baines
These are her words & message today, as she boards that plane across the great waters because the governments of North America keep ignoring our calls:
"I have a heavy task ahead of me that requires all of my positive energy; thus I will leave you with this: I do this for those that cannot speak for themselves, I do this because our earths entire fresh water reserve is only 3% but industry is producing over a billion barrels of oil a day and it takes 3-5 barrels of fresh water to 1barrel of tarsands oil and 90% of that water is not recyclable and contaminated thus sits in insitu ponds and leaches into the ground ultimately leading to destruction; in case you didn't know... When that water's gone, we have no more drinking water. I do this whether you agree or disagree... I do it for everyone. Everyone has a family to feed. I have never stated that I was against the industry, what I do say is that industry and the Canadian Government must be held accountable for not abiding by the agreements set forth and that our inherent right to hunt, fish, and forage is being ignored...I do it for our people... The First People of Canada - our ancestors said, "we will have the ability to use the land as we did yesterday, and the day before that and the day before that, and we will use it that same way tomorrow and the next..." I'm grateful for those that have supported me and those that doubt me. When the tarsands are depleted and our ecosystems destroyed, our Treaties will be gone, and we will not be able to drink that oil or eat that money. I don't parade around yelling, "shut down the tarsands," but I do advocate for ethical oil!"She will be blogging her experience daily at: http://clameman.posterous.com/
The Canadian Government has been sending their people to England to support the Tar sands with no one from Canada to question their motives. Just recently, Canadian Natural Resource Minister, Joe Oliver was cited saying the following in a news release. Max Paris reports on the issue:
"Natural Resources Minister Joe Oliver has quite the sales job ahead of him. As minister in charge of selling the oil sands, there's a lot of bad press to spin out of and ugly pictures to gloss over. Lucky for him, the potential for tens-of-thousands of new jobs and billions of dollars in new revenues make the job that much easier.Not to mention our Indigenous people have been here for thousands, not hundreds, THOUSANDS of years...
Still, when he sat down for an on-camera interview with the CBC's Margo McDiarmid last week, it was hard to ignore when he made his job a whole lot harder.
"That (oilsands) land, which only represents one-thousandth of our boreal forest, is uninhabitable... uh... by human beings. So, you know, no community is being disrupted," according to the minister.
Uh, Joe? It may be uninhabitable by human beings if your idea of human habitat is restricted to the confines of the Toronto riding of Eglinton-Lawrence. But if, say, you live just down the river from the oil sands development in the mainly Cree, Dene and Metis town of Fort Chipewyan, you might have a different take on the possibilities of the human habitability of the area. There are about a thousand people who live in Fort Chip. And they've been doing pretty well ever since the town was founded in 1788..." (read article further at:
Uninhabitability of the oil sands forest)
Here are some links related to what she is doing & to create more awareness:
Crystal Lameman-Cardinal's Blog: she will be blogging her experience daily
Crystal Lameman-Cardinal's response to Joe Oliver
Raven Trust: is a charitable organization (with status both in Canada and the US) that provides financial resources to assist Aboriginal Nations within Canada in lawfully forcing industrial development to be reconciled with their traditional ways of life, and in a manner that addresses global warming or other ecological sustainability challenges.
People & Planet
Tar sands Free: People & Planet: on Facebook
Shared Planet 2011: Global Student Action Festival: on Facebook
Truth, Trials and Tar Sands: The Beaver Lake Cree Nation Battle Bug Oil to Save the Boreal
Indigenous people in legal challenge against oil firms over tar sand project
Google: "Beaver Lake & Tar sands" for more information
(taken from the Facebook page of Tar Sands Free - People & Planet)
This reminds me of an International Indigenous Leadership Gathering (the official site: International Indigenous Leadership Gathering) I went to outside of Lillooet, BC in St'at'imc Lands a few years ago and I was listening to the Indigenous Elders speak. Many spoke from different nations all over the world but one universal message was that us Alberta Indigenous people need to wake up and be true to ourselves, our people, our children, and our Mother ~ Earth. They said the effects of the Oil Sands are affecting all of us all over the world, not just those in Alberta. They said, if any nations are going to affect change and help save us all, it's us Indigenous people located in the province of Alberta. As I sat there and witnessed the effects when I worked on Traditional Lands, and participated on the Soil Ingestion Project this year, I can confirm this to be a truth. We need to use the strength of our Treaty, NOT the INDIAN ACT (totally different than our Treaty) to support us. It says in Treaty #6 that we "shall have right to pursue their avocations of hunting and fishing..."; however, we need a habitat to pursue our Treaty Rights but once the Canadian Government or any other entities affected our rights by destroying or negatively affecting our habitat, prevents us from pursuing our Treaty Right, and they have INFRINGED on that right and broke treaty. Now remember, they approached us to sign treaty, who is upholding the treaty now?
|Crystal's son (please respect & do NOT copy)|
~ It's our children, who will inherit the land,
what are we leaving them?
Now I ask you to ask yourself, Aboriginal Ways of Knowing asks: "What is my responsibility & role in this process?" and Science is now asking through Science-Technology-Society (STS) teaching strategies: "Should we do it?"
We need to remember our fundamental principle responsibility to make our choices based on affecting Seven Generations ahead...
The Fundamental Treaty Principles
ALL Canadian Historical Treaties: AADNC Copies
Treaty #6: AADNC (formally INAC) Copy
Treaty #6: Includes other historical information
Justice for Aboriginal Peoples
Indigenous Voices for the Future: on Facebook
International Indigenous Leadership Gathering: 3rd Annual Gathering ~ Protecting the Sacred May 30th to June 5th, 2011
Soil Exposure, Dr. Blais's Website & Research: I was part of another project where the data will be released in the summer of 2012
Soil Ingestion Project: I was part of a study through the University of Ottawa & I blogged my experience, here is a blog on the 15th closing day
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Here is a must see...
“All students in Canada deserve a learning environment that they are proud to attend, and that gives them hope. We want the same hope as every other Canadian student."
Janet Wilson, Canadian Author, Artist, Speaker has written a book on Shannen's Dream. Janet also has written other excellent books to add to your resources, classroom, and/or library.
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
|My son carrying me at my grad|
I learned to take ownership of my actions
I learned that actions speak louder than words
Monday, October 24, 2011
Public Service Alliance of Canada (PSAC) Aboriginal activists explain the issues behind the unions' campaign for justice for Aboriginal people
About PSAC: http://ugsw.ci-fi.net/psac
Their Official Website: http://ontario.psac.com/
Here are some more reasons WHY WE CAN"T JUST GET OVER IT...
CBC.ca: Ottawa failing aboriginal children
CBC.ca: Ottawa urged to uphold UN aboriginal pledge
Vancouver Sun: Mould, snakes and rates: many First Nations school in wretched condition, UN told
Saturday, October 22, 2011
Response by a woman whose First Nations family is directly impacted:
Canada's Natural Resources Minister, Joe Oliver, was quoted on CBC saying, "tar sands land is uninhabitable… uh… by human beings. So, you know, no community is being disrupted”. People and Planet (Peopleandplanet - UK) responded in support of First Nations people of Canada, "This is a bold-faced lie and an insult to the thousands of First Nations communities whose lives are being disrupted every ...What is the Canadian Gov't saying, First Nations people are not citizens, we don't fall under the definition of a body of people who inhabit land? I mean realistically if they considered us important then they would obviously know that what Mr. Oliver said on their behalf as the Minister of Natural Resources, was completely disrespectful and showed no cause and/or concern for our people... What about our traditional hunting lands, the traplines that our mosoms and khokoms, and tapans subsisted on? The places that we visited as children and even today we still go too, to pick berries, forage, find our medicines when someone is ill; someone struck by cancer of which they depend on those medicines that are natural to us - what if it were kikawiy ekwa/or kohtawiy that needed this, but the Canadian Minister has agreed to destruction because this land is 'uninhabitable' - useless... what would you do? Lack of concern for our Treaty Rights as First Nations people is not acceptable; we're being pushed aside on a daily basis, Government becoming more and more brave to now deliberate ignorance of us, and this is okay?I want it to be known that I am NOT against the oil and gas industry, what I am against however is the unethical stance these industries have had on the destruction of our land and environment, ecosystems, etc. It is so very important that we ensure in making agreement that they are upheld and abided by so as to protect our rights and our ability in the sustainability of the land and it's resources. Ethical issues are very sensitive and they must be treated in that manner - ensure your people are protected, ensure when you sign that line industry is legally responsible and ensure you fear not holding them accountable for not honoring the agreements set forth. ~ THIS is what I speak on, this is where my opinion lies, and this is where my committment is imbedded indefinitely.
[UK Tar Sands Network] is a PERFECT example of the SUPPORT we have as First Nations people on a global level - Internationally people standing up in representation of OUR Treaty Rights; unafraid to challenege the Canadian Government in its attempts at deliberate ignorance against the Traditional lands and territories of which we occupy. PLEASE watch this and pass it on.
Canada poses as “Friendly, Green Oil Giant” to win over UK universities
Original Website: http://www.no-tar-sands.org/2011/10/canada-poses-as-“friendly-green-oil-giant”-to-win-over-uk-universities/
Liam Barrington-Bush is a Canadian working the UK for People and Planet
Sunday, September 25, 2011
The White & Black Buffalo have been born
Updated information on the White & the Black buffalo, born in Farmington, PA under unusual circumstances and now living at Nemacolin Woodlands Resort
UNSOLVED MYSTERIES - The White Buffalo
Even the non-Native People are amazed
Native American tribes are certain the white buffalo calf born on a WI farm is the answer to a centuries old belief. It was announced within the last 5 years that this buffalo had died & this video was posted April 2010.
More Information on the Living Prophecy & see where they live at the Woodland Zoo
Thursday, September 22, 2011
Thursday, September 8, 2011
Shannon M Houle
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Thanks for your patience & I look forward to your comments.
I also added an easy way to follow my blog by email, so feel free to submit your email for notifications
Take Care ya all :)
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Day 15 (Wednesday, August 31st, 2011):
|Bannock: We waited 15 days to eat to|
our hearts content
When we arrived there were a lot of community members and it was a full house. My mom, brother, Ken, Darilyn, & other family members came too. It was so nice to see so many family today.
Chief Eric Gadwa from Kehewin Cree Nation spoke and thanked us all for being part of this project and so did Dave Scott of Tribal Chiefs Ventures. They asked for me & Duane to speak about our experience and I couldn't help but get emotional because I felt so much gratitude but I also encouraged the people to please go back to the land and feel it's strength & transquility. Of all the things, I spoke about I can only hope that one person heard me pleading for them to help save our Mother ~ Earth & for all of us to protect her, for ourselves too...for our survival!
These are my new found family...FYI: this is the first time any of us have dressed up & it was the first time I did my hair in 15 days...we clean up gooooddddd (lol).
|My Sweet Angelle,my partner in crime|
|Our scholar, Graham...he would remind me to stop being a mom|
(well, he's the same age as Germain)
|Our Muskrat Warrior, Duane...he kept us safe & laughing|
|Our Humble Elder, John...when he spoke, you listened|
Tom Piche (background), Director of E-Bay Centre
|Our Bull Rider Ryan, the ladies man, hee, hee &|
Our Storytelling Outfitter, Gerald...he kept us fat for the Bears lol
|Soil Injection Project: Our Group (L to R):|
Graham, Angelle, John, Gerald, Shannon (Me), Ryan, Duane, Brian
We also can't say enough about how grateful we felt for all the staff at Cold Lake English Bay Community Centre and all the friendly and generious caring community members of Cold Lake First Nations for all their kindness, stories, & just stopping in and being with us at our camp....we will miss you, our daily visitor, Dennis...keep drinking that mint tea.
All I know I, is I made great friends & family for life, I plan to start coming out here each year & go hunt & gather north of Cold Lake and do what our people have done for thousands of years...be with our Mother!
Now, I ask you ~ "What are you going to do to help Mother Earth & SAVE us ALL!...ONE Person can Make a Difference!
Day 15 (Wednesday, August 31st, 2011):
I woke at 6:00 AM with a text from Ken informing me the imported blueberries were on their way picked near Kehewin Cree Nation on Moose Mountain.
Everyone was up early and I heard our Muskrat Warrior leave and he came back with Tim Horton's coffee, hmmmmm good. Then, Graham crawled out of his tent and got into his truck & left. Everyone was on the go! He returned about 30 minutes later with Tim Horton's donuts, now that was awesome. We hadn't been able to eat donuts throughout this project, we feasted waiting for Ken to get here with our blueberries. He was soon to arrive by 7:30 AM or so.
We were going to use the delicious blueberries for the special pancakes Angelle & I would make for the whole camp. However, we would make sure a sample went with Graham, so he could have a comparable sample miles away from the major activity of oil plants. Ken even provided him with a global positioning (GPS) location. He arrived with Darilyn, my son's girlfriend...she was hurting, it was too early for her because just the night before her, Ken, & Germain came to visit me late after everyone went to bed. Germain was heading out to work & I hadn't seen him since I arrived at the camp, so I was glad to see him, even if it was for only an hour.
The pancakes were awesome with bacon & eggs, we made so much that there was plenty to send over to the staff at the Cold Lake First Nations English Bay Community Centre. It was our last meal together in our little family camp. We soon gulped our food down, licked our lips, gave some good belly rubs to finish the feast, & sat for a few minutes washing down our meal with fresh coffee and conversation.
Once everyone was set to start the rest of the day & get ready for the Special Lunch the staff at the Cold Lake First Nations English Bay Community Centre was bepairing in our honor, I suggested we have a closing circle while Muskrat Warrior's dad, Alex Janvier was present with us. So, we all arose from our seats and did our last walk towards our famous campfire, stood around it, one last time...
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Well, today is the last day for gathering and collecting data. I'm kind of grieving this day today & at the same time trying to embed every moment of this experience in my head, heart, & spirit. I think we all (our whole camp) is feeling a little sentimental today, we get our moments of silence but what I hear in the silence is all of knowing we will miss each other and this experience. On the other hand, many of us are ready to go home and back to our lives outside of this little family camp we created. Don't get me wrong, being ready to go home, doesn't mean we want this to end. I know for me, I always loved the feeling of tranquility in the camp, there is something here that we just don't get from our everyday lives...
I woke this morning and had a hard time getting to sleep last night, I was a little anxious about the bear that was close to my camp the other day. It felt strange, that "fear" I felt last night, I haven't felt that way the whole time I was here, even all those times we just missed a bear in the bushes. Anyways, I did a little prayer and left it up to the Creator to watch over me & besides, I don't think a bear thinks I'm that tasty anyways (laughing). So, I went to bed with that thought and told the bear spirit to let me sleep in peace tonight as I drifted off into dreamland.
When we all woke, we had our usual good mornings and Muskrat Warrior's usual "Good Morning Princess" (lol). I always get a kick out of that, he says it with such enthusiasm and makes us all laugh. We had breakfast and we didn't really have anything planned for the day like hunting and/or gathering. I guess part of that was because today would be the last day we would give our "Famous Samples" to be sent to "That Big City of Ottawa". I never thought, I'd be anxious to get that part of this research done with...I think we all are (hee, hee).
Most of us, not me, slowly packed our things. Angelle helped her dad to start packing the kitchen area but only enough so we could have our last meal tomorrow. Angelle & I planned a great breakfast for all of us & we know it's going to be awesome because it's something we all had been missing the whole time we were here...YOU'LL have to read tomorrows journal to see what it is...
|An abandoned camp we saw days before hidden in the bushes|
away from the road, such beauty to be disrespected
|This sign is just a hop skip & a jump from homes, cabins &|
a pristine lake Brian advised us not to eat the berries we
picked near there
Graham & I got in their rental truck & headed out to a few places. One location I took him to was in one of Imperial Esso's area north of Ethal Lake. We stopped to get some more soil samples too from an area I had gathered days earlier and was uncertain if I took enough samples before. As we drove along, I stuck the reader out the truck window and stayed focused on seeing if their were any indicators of chemicals in the air. Well, there was nothing, we were relieved but just by looking at the vegetation, I knew there was something in the air or soil that was making the plants look sickly. All we knew, is those certain cancer causing chemicals weren't here or there wasn't enough, in the air, to read.
We continued on to the major Esso Plant and as we drove and got closer to the Plants, I started to get a headache and feel nauseous. Graham, said it could be a result of all the oil activity here with the Plants and Wells. He said Jules, gets that way too because he is sensitive to air pollution. I told him I'm like that too, ever since I did a whole body cleansing, I am hyper sensitive to pollutants in the air. That's also why I am highly allergic is cigarette second hand smoke. It's a good thing that my body won't tolerate pollutants but it can be annoying at times. However, I could use this hyper sensitivity to my advantage & be a walking pollution monitor (hee hee)!
Then, we got right next to one of the big Esso Plants, now I was sick and could smell a gross odor that was strong. As I could smell it, I felt so sad for the animals and I told Graham I felt bad for them, that they have to live with this and I wondered what it did to the animals and their offspring or how it affected their reproduction cycles...
|We were parked right of the plant getting close ups, these|
are one of many sites, it's a maze of pipelines throughout
We ended our tour by seeing the Plant closer, seeing the open flames above the plant, and we headed back to camp. By the time we got to camp, which was a 30-40 min drive, I was feeling better but I was even more curious to find out the results of all our tests, samples, and research in the past 14 days. We wouldn't know those results until next summer when the research team returns. We were all assured we will get copies and the results will be public knowledge. I will definitely use this experience in my elementary teaching classroom once I complete my degree this year & graduate, this following June from the University of Alberta with the license to "corrupt children" (hee, hee) ~ in a good way, of course!.
Back at camp, we had our last supper and sat around the camp fire and Graham shared with us how much he enjoyed being with us and thanked us for all our support by being part of this research project. I told Graham, that we all will be expecting a plane fare to his graduation when he gets his Masters Degree...he just laughed and the teasing began...
It was nice, we sat for a while around the camp fire enjoying each others company, one last time, like this, a moment in time, we would never have again! We definately made this experience more than a research project, everyone of us put our hearts and souls into it & because of that, it was more than a project...we created a family!
Like I said earlier... there is something here that we just don't get from our everyday lives...it's that spiritual connection to our Mother ~ Earth. It feels familiar because the closest connection I can describe that is almost similar is the unconditional strong connection a mother feels with her child as she breastfeeds her baby. It's not only a physical connection but a spiritual, emotional and mental connection. If you are still confused by what I mean, take a child you love with all your heart, hold him or her is your arms, empty your mind and heart from the outside world, and open your heart up to only feel unconditional love for that child...now you understand! This is the feeling I get when I am with our Mother ~ Earth, as I spent time with her, she clothed me in love & left me with a feeling of tranquility and peace!